Aesthetic Realism Foundation

How to Study

Understanding Marriage!

Taught by Aesthetic Realism consultants Barbara Allen, Meryl Nietsch-Cooperman, & Devorah Tarrow

Through studying the opposites of contempt and respect in the history of marriage and in their own lives including yesterday’s incident at the breakfast table — wives learn how to use marriage and a husband to like the world. There is class discussion of such subjects as:

  • Real Trust in Marriage—How Can We Have It?
  • Is Understanding Your Husband Exciting?
  • How Can a Wife Feel Proud about Sex?
  • First Cupid, Then Quarrels—What’s the Cause?

2nd Saturday of each month, 11:00 AM – 12:30 PM Eastern Time (USA)

Fall 2023 classes via video conference are now in session.

  • Sep 9   Fresh Meaning in Marriage: What Is It & How Can We Have It?

Meaning is the beautiful relation of something to the world. Relation and meaning are quite akin. . . .The purpose of love is to see oneself better and everything else better. The enclosing way will not work, the possessive way.

In making a thing just for us, we take away its meaning. And that is the danger of possessiveness: it is the great destroyer of meaning. The only way one can be sure in love is to feel, “Being close to this person makes me love the world more; and that is how I want to use the person.”

—Eli Siegel, The Right of Aesthetic Realism to Be Known, #2098

  • Oct 14   The Tumult in Marriage about Managing vs. Knowing

Love is the feeling that by being affected deeply by another, beginning by knowing that other, you are going to be more yourself. It is not looked on in this fashion….The fight always is—whether we are going to enjoy things because we are going to make those things appendages to ourselves, make those things under our control; or whether we’re going to feel that we have them because we know them.

—Eli Siegel, from Aesthetic Realism and Love

  • Nov 11   How Well Do We Listen? or, the Art of Listening in Marriage

Right now there are quite a few homes in the New York area where someone says, “Something is amiss—I was talking and he/she didn’t seem to be listening to me.” Since listening is so much a part of life, we should ask: Do I expect anything very much from listening? People do expect a great deal listening to music, but there is another listening that people have pretty much given up on. Listening should be accompanied with comprehension. It’s an artistic, deep, compassionate, and critical thing.

—Eli Siegel, from What Precedes, TRO 961

  • Dec 9   The Drama in Marriage about Generosity & Selfishness

We are interested in another; we want to please that person. There is a desire to fetch unknown cups of water for unknown thirsts….[But] two married people find out very soon that with all the devotion, the selves uttering the devotion seem to be interested in themselves. No matter how many errands have been run, how many kind words have been said, self is still there, doing business in behalf of the central firm….There is an aesthetic mix-up, which means there is bad aesthetics, as to the business that marriage insists on: of being oneself and another self too.

—Eli Siegel, from The Furious Aesthetics of Marriage

 

 

Want to audit a class?

  • Contact the registrar at 212.777.5055, between 2-6 PM Eastern Time (USA), Monday through Friday.
  • Be sure to make your request at least 2 days in advance of the class.

Once you receive permission to audit a class, click on the “AUDIT” button to pay the fee:

Fee: $40 per semester (4 classes)

Auditing fee: $12

FACULTY BIOS:
Barbara Allen, Meryl Nietsch-Cooperman, Devorah Tarrow

Women say–

Claudia Senatore

“I had a lot of confusion and trouble in love. This class changed the direction of my life and taught me how to be successful caring for a man. I learned that a man is related to the whole world! I’m proud and grateful to be married to my dear husband and to be celebrating our 11th anniversary.” —Claudia Senatore, Nurse Practitioner

Monique Michael“I learned what true love is and it has made me feel integrated as a wife, teacher, daughter, and friend. I now really talk to my husband–and am really able to listen. Our conversations are now exciting! Not only do I love my husband more, but I care more for other people and the world itself. This class makes love possible and permanent.” —Monique Michael, Teacher

Lori Colavito“After a failed marriage, I was able to learn about the mistakes I made in love. As a result, when my second husband and I exchanged marriage vows, it was one of the proudest days of my life because I knew I was getting married for the right reason! Six years later, our marriage is flourishing.” —Lori Colavito, Teacher

You can read these news articles:

1. “Learn How Marriage Can Succeed in a Failed Economy“
2. “How Should a Widow Cope with the Loss of Her Spouse?“

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