Pauline Meglino, Aesthetic Realism consultant, writes:
In kitchens and living rooms, husbands and wives have cried, “You haven’t been listening to a word I’m saying” and “Hear me out!” Many a wife can feel her husband turns a deaf ear to what she’s saying; and a husband can feel his wife would rather talk than hear what he has to say. Yet, even as they object to poor listening, or seem to take it for granted, wives and husbands can despair of its ever changing. And the resulting loneliness and resentment are with couples daily.
What will enable real listening to be and thrive in married life will be explained at the Understanding Marriage! class on Saturday, January 9th, from 11:00 AM to 12:30 PM. The subject is: The Art of Listening in Marriage.
Wonderfully practical, spirited discussions always take place in these classes, taught by consultants Barbara Allen, Anne Fielding, and me. There will be discussion of the following sentences by Eli Siegel, founder of Aesthetic Realism, from a lecture he gave on the subject:
Right now there are quite a few homes in the New York area where someone says, ‘Something is amiss—I was talking and he/she didn’t seem to be listening to me.’ Since listening is so much a part of life, we should ask: Do I expect anything very much from listening? People do expect a great deal listening to music, but there is another listening that people have pretty much given up on. Listening should be accompanied with comprehension. It’s an artistic, deep, compassionate, and critical thing.
The class will be showing what has not been understood before: The listening with comprehension a wife wants and needs to have begins with her wanting to know and value the world, including her husband—and this liking of the world is the purpose of marriage itself. Learning this, and learning what “artistic, deep, compassionate, and critical” listening is, enables a wife to listen with fresh ears to her husband, and makes honest, fresh communication between them a reality!